Updated: Feb 18
"A man without a vision, is a man without a future, and an man without a future is a man who always returns to his past."
Less than a year ago, I married my husband. We will soon have our first anniversary and WOW, they weren't kidding when they said 'marriage teaches you a lot' - it does, and it's amazing! Being married has taught me so many priceless lessons, but the one thing that has challenged me is vision.
My husband and I got married quite quickly. We met, became friends, fell in love, dated, got engaged and married all in a span of 15 months. As a result of this, a lot of the time that we were engaged, our wedding was the dominant factor in our conversations. We had all these decisions to make and things to do. Planning our wedding took over all our conversations with each other - understandable right? The issue is, we spent more time talking about the wedding than the marriage. So we have this amazing, beautiful, wedding that fulfilled everything we both dreamed of and I remember sitting in my hotel room decompressing from all of the excitement and thinking: now what? As a girl, I dreamt of my wedding day as far back as I can remember, and that day had just gone. Suddenly, everything we'd put our energy and excitement towards for months, was over - just like that.
Sometimes we're like this in life. We set ideals or postmarks of life goals: get an education, find a job, get married, have a couple of kids, retire, travel, etc. It's great to have that, but what happens when we get there? You see, the wedding is a short-term goal, but the marriage - that's long term. My vision should have been for what our marriage would look like, what would we want to do with our lives, where do we want to go, how will our lives matter, rather than 'have a great wedding'.
One day, we'll have kids and so my goal now is not just 'be a mom', but I've got to be thinking about how I want to raise them, what values, morals, fundamentals do I want them to live with and so on. This goes with everything in life. We often set achievements as our goals and don't think about what we'll do when we get there. As a result, we find ourselves looking back on the 'glory days' thinking our best years are behind us.
Truth time: the best is yet to come! When we live with a sense of vision and purpose, we work hard and give ourselves to learning. As a result, instead of stagnating, we evolve. Our wedding was a great day, but we have so much more to look forward to. Together, we build a vision for what our lives should be. Your achievements are not what defines you, but what you do when you get there!
Life is full of goals, short term goals and long term goals. Unknowingly, we do live with some sense of purpose: we want to accomplish XYZ today, and we schedule our days accordingly. But we often fail to look beyond the day, to look ahead. As a result we have short term purpose, but in the long run, we look back and wonder what did I really accomplish? Our goal should be to be able to answer that question with a wealth of stories. The question to ask is 'who do I want to be?’ rather than 'what do I want to be?’ I am a wife, a daughter, a sister, an employee, a friend and so much more, but those are titles – that doesn’t define who I am!
To have a vision is to have a future, and having a future means your 'glory days' are yet to come!
Jrevolution, is a nonprofit organization working with people of all walks of life to find fulfillment & purpose within their lives by giving them the tools they need to live an impactful purpose driven life. Many people live their day to day lives searching for purpose and meaning, but no matter how many different methods they use to find this, they never seem to obtain it. You may be in need of a new beginning. Watch Neogenesis by signing up on our website (www.jrevolution.net) or watch Neogenesis on our YouTube link below to find out more...
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